I cried a lot these two days. First, I cried over my sins and my tumbling spiritual conditions. Then, I cried over the incredible salvation of my aunt's mother, who is about to pass away. And, I cried when I read the email sent by my dad a few days ago... Finally, I cried when my mom reminded me of how many of my good friends just come and go during my times in Waterloo...it's just too painful to think about it...sigh...

Meaningless notes: I visited a couple of Christian bookstores today, buying absolutely nothing, which is kind of disappointing; I hate the way I'm wasting time, living with no motivations nor directions; I finally picked up the phone and changed the credit card that my car insurance is billed to...such a simple task, yet it took so long, since I really hate to call strangers; I tried to get the brothers together for some activities this evening, with no luck; family arrives on the 26th, two of them leaving on the 1st, the other leaving in November; how can I serve God when Christ isn't even remotely at the centre of my life?; finished 3 out of 130 sermons on the book of Hebrews now...boy it is difficult stuff.

I'm grateful to God for...

• the salvation of my aunt's mother, touching the hearts of many;
• softening my heart towards my family, even just a little bit;
• reducing my violent impulses greatly today;
• giving me enough courage to make the silly insurance phone call; and
• loving me, even now.