79 hours, 2 cities, 1320.6 kilometres. I had really mixed feelings about this trip. On one hand, it's very nice and heart warming to be with Samuel's family. On the other hand, the exploration of the city was just torturous, physically, mentally, emotionally.

What if...what if...WHAT IF?!?! Sigh... Would I be in such pain if I had done things slightly differently? Why was I so disobedient to the Lord? Why all the pain, Lord? Am I ever going to run out of tears? How is it that I can be so idiotic as to always manage to screw-up close friendships? I'm jumping around in agony, and I don't know how to stop it. If only I knew...if only...if only...

I'm grateful to God for...

• the safe trip to Montreal and back;
• once again revealing to me my weaknesses of always trying to save face, keep myself behind an invisible wall, shy away from confrontations, trying to please men instead of God, and how easy it is for me to breakdown;
• the opportunity to seriously talk to Jeff briefly and sharing my burdens with him;
• keeping life interesting; and
• listening to me, despite my complaints and doubts.