In matroid class today, I've only done one exercise. So when Jim asked who would like to volunteer to do a question, lots of hands were raised, he picked someone else, who then proceeded to pick the question that I can do. A perhaps not-so-subtle silent "doh" caught the attention of some people and generated some laughs. The guy did it in a very rigorous but complicated way. Jim asked if someone else has a simpler solution, and he picked someone else to do it. Well, this other guy did it in a strange way. After it ends, Jim asked again if someone has a simpler solution, this time with a laugh. I couldn't tell if he was joking or not, so I didn't go for it. I had a proof by picture (heh), and it's supposed to be a lot easier to understand than the other two proofs...but anyway, it's all in the past. Now I'm supposed to do some research work today, but didn't...

There is something mysterious about physical contact, the human touch...I don't know why, but somehow I kind of want to have more of it...whether it be handshakes, pats on the back (or other nonsensitive body parts), hugs, punches, or even wrestling...I guess something about the Chinese culture limits this kind of thing, especially within my family. Maybe it's because of this lack of physical contact that makes me desire more of it...

I find that I have been sort of retreating back to my little cocoon, so-to-speak, becoming ever so solitary. I don't know why I just didn't want to go to the office, I didn't want to contact anyone to go out for a meal or other activities. I just stayed home most of the time now. What's going on here is kind of bothering me, because I'm afraid that I would lose the close connection that I had with my friends. I'm also afraid that this is dragging me back to the dark old days...on the other hand, perhaps this is a sign that I'm not so dependent on the validation of friends...but maybe I'm just deceiving myself.