Spent the morning and afternoon preparing notes for second stage comps, also a preparation for today's supervisor meeting. I was without food, and was really tired, so obviously I was in a kind of sedated mode during the meeting. I just felt very deflated afterwards, because apparently I'll need to do a dry run next week already, and there's so much to do on it. Yet I just don't have the interest or will to do it all... Sigh...all those days of slacking off are really catching up to me...but I really didn't slack off this past week, more like spending a lot more time on God...so I don't know, things are pulling me apart.

Why am I so selfish? I used to love, care and pray about other people, and now I...don't. Why? Frustration, maybe? Or was it something else?

In a world that demands instant answers, God appears to work the opposite way, most of the time...