Ah...I don't like to be under the sun...heh.

Heard from Clarence that people are talking about how I've opened up recently. I guess I would agree. It's all thanks to mom, I think. Looking back at this year, it's only been three months, but I've changed so much...not just on this, but also the way I look at spiritual things, and many other aspects of my life. It's been a rollercoaster ride, and I thank God for everything, all the joy and the pain. I truly pray that I don't go back to the way I was before the year started...

I keep reading about total surrender and obedience to God, and I truly want to do that...or do I? That's one of the things that's bothering me. I know how God works...supposedly...He would always ask me to do the things that I don't want to do the most. I've heard so many testimonies about it. Surely I can say and think these grand things and believe them, but do I truly believe? What does it mean to believe? I'm having a headache...