Seriously considering whether or not I should continue on with the PhD program... I have trouble handling the first semester, so why should I expect things to get easier later on? Maybe it's just that lots of other things happen this semester...I don't know.

Why do I always keep myself unhappy in spite of happy circumstances? (Here's a bad example: Right now, I feel bad about feeling happy about something happened that made another person feel sad...) (Here's a good example: I feel bad about myself and the thoughts that run through my head and many of my sinful actions, even though it was my birthday and everybody was cheering...)

I guess I won't re-iterate the overwhelmingness of the coming days...